Some Say Love

In my relationships, I seek to experience various characteristics of love. I hope that, at first, passion will play a role in my relationships, a force or "fever" that, like in Rihanna's song "Stay," "will make me feel like I can't live without" my partner. Although I wish for relative degrees of passion and desire, a serious relationship requires a great deal more. In my opinion, I believe that true acceptance is a key element in a successful romance and, as Ingrid Michaelson sings in the heartwarming "Way I Am," I would expect my partner to overlook my flaws just like I would do his. In a similar way, I strongly feel that a committed relationship should be built on mutual understanding between those involved. As Dot consoles George and encourages him to pursue his dreams in the touching song "Move On," one of the most notable pieces in Stephen Sondheim's  Sunday in the Park with George, a couple must, looking deep within each other, comfort, support, and motivate the one another. Such understanding must also be matched by sincere loyalty. Although arguably a bit melodramatic, Gilda's sentiments--"my desire will fly to you on the wings of thought and my last breath will be yours, my beloved"-- expressed in "Caro Nome," one of opera's most famous arias, beautifully capture the importance of loyalty and the power of love. A result of all these different qualities and characteristics of love, however, the ultimate pursuit of a serious relationship, in my opinion, is unity. In my romantic relationships, I seek to experience a deep, unifying bond with my partner, so that we, like Tony and Maria in West Side Story, may "make of our hands, one hand; make of our hearts, one heart." By this reasoning, I do support the idea of true soul mates. Although I realize that we may not always find our soul mate, I believe that there are people who we are destined to be with.

Gender

1.     Although I have independently adopted more progressive views, I was raised with the more traditional concepts of femininity and gender roles. I was frequently told to cross my legs properly and to be “lady-like.” However, I was very close with my older brother and, although I adored my Barbie and Polly Pocket dolls, I also loved to spend hours playing Legos, K’Nex, and other traditional “boy” games. In spite of their concern for propriety, my parents have always encouraged me to pursue my dreams regardless of my gender. In contrast, my grandmother holds very conventional ideas of gender roles and often advocates and emphasizes more domestic pursuits. While I disagree with her views, I understand that she was raised during a very different time in a very different world. Vacuuming, washing, and cooking were seen as a woman’s ultimate domain as she fulfilled her duties to her husband and children. In fact, my great-grandfather was actually happy when my grandmother rejected the opportunity to attend college.

2.     My siblings and I have always been held to the same standards and expectations. Games or activities were never deemed off-limits because of gender. Although I enjoyed playing kitchen and dolls, I loved to play outside, run around, and climb trees. In a similar way, my brother, my sister, and I are each required to offer service and fulfill household responsibilities. Although I, unlike my brother, was spared the chore of mowing the lawn, this exemption, like every other, was due to a disparity of ages rather than gender traditions.

3.     My experience at an all-girls high school has powerfully impacted my understanding gender and has influenced the way in which I perceive myself and my potential. Surrounded entirely by girls, I have been able to express myself without inhibition or pressure. At the Mount, gender is actually not an issue, allowing every student to grow and learn freely. Although problems exist as they would in any learning environment, such tensions revolve around academic or social issues, not gender competition. I also believe one of the most influential aspects of the Mount is that most of the teachers are also women. A female faculty, in addition to an entirely female student body, allows for candid and open class discussions about relevant topics. As a young woman, I have been able to develop my personal identity supported by my peers and inspired by my teachers.

4.     In spite of my egalitarian views and feminist leanings, I admit that I do expect a certain degree of chivalry from a man. Society, culture, and tradition have instilled in me this desire for such chivalrous behavior such as holding the door or fixing the faucet. However, I do not believe that household chores should be designated by gender and I anticipate my partner to wash the dishes or vacuum. Although my parents portray more traditional gender roles, their situation is dictated more by events than stereotypes or views. While I do consider it more romantic for a man to perform more “chivalrous” acts of affection, I believe that my relationships will be characterized by mutual respect, openness, and kindness rather than archaic ideas regarding gender.

Miss-Representation

Female fashions naturally evolve in cycles of varying degrees of provocativeness. In fact, many of the most fashionable gowns of times past would seem quite risqué today. Throughout history, women have always flaunted their assets and utilized their sexuality to achieve their desires and advance. Though this objectification and sexualization of women is therefore not an entirely new dilemma, it is incredibly disturbing to see girls subjected to such sexual pressure at younger and younger ages. Billboards and magazines are covered with either waif-like or perfectly voluptuous models in provocative poses wearing little more than underwear, if even that. Girls, from the moment they are born, are bombarded with images of half-dressed women who appear to lack both brains and conscience. Shows like Toddlers in Tiaras only serve to promote this unhealthy obsession with the degrading emphasis on the superficiality of women and completely disgust me. If these are the only images that girls see, it can be completely devastating when their body does not look like what society has deemed to be the ideal. Consequently, there are record number of girls who are reporting eating disorders, depression, and activities of self-harm. Who does a girl look up to when her chest is too flat or her legs are too short?

Although women have made significant progress in the American work force and have assumed positions of great leadership and authority, we still face great challenge and adversity. We consistently earn less than men, with the average woman making only $0.81 for every dollar earned by a man in the same position. In addition, females are often passed over in favor of lesser-qualified men in regards to promotions and bonuses. Yet, in my opinion, the greatest threat to the advancement of women in the workplace is the pervasion of labels and stereotypes. While a man in power will be regarded as authoritative, a woman in the same position will often be called demanding or domineering. In a similar way, women in the workplace are often criticized for neglecting their “domestic duties” such as cleaning, cooking, and childrearing. My biggest complaint, however, is that women are judged so much more harshly than men on their physical appearance. The comments sections of YouTube videos of incredible female leaders such as Angela Merkel or Julia Gillard are littered with remarks about how ugly they are or how “un-beddable” they are, rather than actual criticisms about their political policies or actions. I too have personally encountered sexism within my own experiences at Mock Trial competitions, Model U.N. conferences, and intro-to-business events—activities that are traditionally male-dominated. Even if there are no direct comments made, the gender issue at these functions is always the “elephant in the room” and I feel like I have to work harder to prove my right to be there and excel.

Mount has served to empower me and encourage me to pursue my dreams in spite of adversity. From its motto to its mission statement, Mount teaches every one of us that we should not be ashamed of our femininity, but rather that we should embrace it. Throughout these past four years, I have come to realize my potential. Certain female teachers have also acted as important mentors to me and I greatly appreciate all the advice, guidance, and assistance they have given to me over the course of my time at Mount. Although I feel that Mount sometimes promotes gender stereotyping by upholding a “cookie-cutter” model of a young, successful woman, my experience in such a rich and inspiring environment has enabled me to gain self-assurance and self-confidence, and I know I will graduate prepared to not only face social adversity, but thrive in spite of it. 

My Mission Statement

I strive:

To beLieve in myself and my abilities;

To accept my limItations and celebrate my talents;

To neVer compromise integrity for success;

To challengE myself;

To always pursUe my passions;

To defeat the awkwardness, ignoraNce, and blindness within myself and my society;

To fIght for the arts;

To love teNderly and selflessly;

To cherisH the simple moments of life;

To always recognize God’s presence In my life;

To never Become too absorbed in the superficial;

To utilize my gifts for the benefIt of others;

To give honor and credit where honor and crediT are due;

To explore the world around mE;

To Dream;

To LIVE UNINHIBITED.

Identity

Throughout my life, many different factors have influenced me and shaped my identity. My siblings, in particular, have made a huge impact on who I am today. Being blessed with a brother 7 years my elder and a sister 8 years my younger, I have the privilege of enjoying all the benefits of the position of middle child. A childhood playmate, my brother would spend countless hours caring for me, entertaining me, and challenging me. Even as I have gotten older, my brother has always been there for me with quiet patience and tender willingness. In a similar way, my little sister has blessed me with so much joy, happiness, and laughter. From when she was a baby, my sister and I have been inseparable and we continue to share our hearts with one another. Although my siblings can sometimes frustrate me, I realize how important their constant love and support has been to me throughout my life.

Music, particularly opera, has also played a major role in shaping my identity and is an essential part of my current self. In spite of my musical experience, I am actually not a musician at the moment. However, music and the arts are my passion. Music enabled me to find my way when the path seemed dark, it gave me something unique and special to cherish. I love opera and, though many people my age may find this interest bizarre or “uncool,” classical music has allowed me to connect with fellow, young opera-fans across the country both online and in-person. Art both comforts me and encourages me to grow and develop myself as an individual. Unfortunately, modern society often does not place enough value on great artistic expression and so I hope to dedicate my life to the promotion of the arts and arts education.

Yet perhaps one of the most influences on my sense of self and personal identity has been my experience as a Mount student. Coming from a tiny school where I had struggled and failed to secure any social standing, I was extremely excited to come to Mount. However, while I expected to expand my academic perspicacity, I had no idea of the emotional, social, and spiritual impact that my Mount education would have on me. Throughout the years, I have had the privilege to meet and befriend so many wonderful students and teachers. In discussing matters of life, be they my social plans for the weekend or the significance of Macbeth’s soliloquy, I have explored new facets of myself and the world around me. Though I understand that my personal journey is still only in its infancy, I, armed with so many wonderful friendships and memories, feel prepared to continue down the road of life.